Friday, May 11, 2007

Boo Hiss Pffffffft


Okay, I'm just gonna say it straight up: I hate to exercise. I find it boring. I've tried videos, books, my iPod cranked up to peppy music---booorrriinng.

I cannot begin to list all the various and sundry pieces of equipment designed to make exercise FUN! EXCITING! FULFILLING! that have made interesting objects d'art in my life over the years. Well, yes, I can begin to list them. Let's see, there have been a series of stationary bikes--traditional, super-duper, and recumbent. There have been stair steppers, bands, balls and mini tramps. There is currently a dust-covered Gazelle in the corner with quilting fabric piled on the foot rails and a couple of shirts hanging over the handles.

"Take a walk," you say. Well, I could do that. I would probably be a) murdered or b) eaten by mosquitos or c) both, but I could do that. "Walk at the mall," you say. Well, sure, I could do that except the nearest mall is in the 'burbs 45 minutes away and I work 10 hours a day.

So of course I was pleased as punch at the recent reports that exercise doesn't really contribute to weight loss in any significant way, even though I knew that wasn't true for health in general. Now, even that self-lie won't work, as these British doctors have taken it on themselves to say even thin people who don't exercise are borderline obese because they have "hidden fat."

Great. I not only have visible fat but now hidden fat as well.

Okay, guys, help me out here. Anyone with ideas that go beyond "just do it?"

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